Do you think nonbinary is real?

Anonymous

No, I think it’s a social trend dominating social media that young people feel pressured into through guilt trips and peer pressure, that has absolutely zero basis in neurobiology and has been incredibly harmful due to its unjustifiable association with transsexualism and sex dysphoria.

Thank you, for your response and thanks for the tip as well. I really appreciate it. I'm a bit scared of the surgery but I'm excited that in a few months I'll finally be done and reached my goal.

And thank you for the blog in general. It helped reading of someone who treats transsexuality like you do. Respectfully.

Anonymous

Good luck anon 👍

the stigma about bottom surgery seems to have shifted generationwise. i'm from switzerland and in a support group. mostly 25 to 60 yo. claims like "not worth it/enough" would get you thrown out lmao. you're even getting side-eyed for wanting "just" meta. personally i'm afraid of phallo so I settled for meta, which is honestly not as unsatisfactory as I thought. despite the size it relieved my discomfort immensely and it fulfils its function. even though i'd prefer a phallo it's a good compromise for me. I do not regret it nor do I want phalloplasty anymore. also I had no complications. people try to impose their expectations and perceptions on you, in the end your experience will be unique. for some current methods are not enough, for others you have to get them all to be a real ftm transsexual. imo it can be generalized to say every ftm wants a real phallo. but it's not ideal and we'll have to make do with what's offered. I suggest visiting the website "ftm-portal". it is mainly a german-austria-swiss information platform and forum. some posts are in english. there are lots of reports and experiences being shared, even pictures of results (though you have sign up for that). 

Anonymous

Posting the tip for anon.

I’ve seen a lot of very young people say those things on Tumblr though. But I’m wondering now if the difference lies in nationality, or more specifically, if those complaints come from people who’d have to pay for these surgeries out of pocket, versus people in countries that cover these costs through health insurance.

I’ve always strongly questioned those that claim to have a male identity, but experience no bottom dysphoria nor desire bottom surgery. You’d be hard-pressed to find a cisgender man who wouldn’t desperately desire any kind of constructive surgery if he were to lose his penis (and for that matter, I’ve never known a single guy not to answer the question what he’d do if he lost it, with “I’d fucking kill myself”). So this nonchalance about not only lacking a penis, but having female genitalia instead, it always blows my mind to hear this from someone who insists they’re male. But that sort of thing gets you heavily side-eyed on the website of calling yourself transgender for any random reason.

Hi, do you know any other languages besides Dutch and English? What languages interest you/ Do you have some you would like to learn?

Anonymous

I also speak a dialect that you could count as a separate language. Other than that, it’s mostly bits and pieces. I can read and understand German for the most part, but only speak broken German at best. Used to be able to hold a simple conversation in French, but never kept up with practice; though I did find just recently that I could still read the back of a French wine bottle, lmao. Bits of Spanish, bits of Japanese from weeb years, picked up Swedish on Duolingo once but never continued with it.

I can learn languages with some ease, I just no longer feel any real motivation to take it to the point where I’m learning to speak them. It’s just random words and sentences here and there. I do think learning languages is fun, so hopefully in the future I’ll have the incentive to do so again. Maybe spiff up my French for a holiday in France.

You recently answered an ask about current methods being "advanced enough" and I'd really like to thank you for your answer. In September I'll finally receive Hysterectomy and Metoidioplasty and so far I've only heard discouragement from majority of my "support group". Even though I shouldn't have expected my "support group" to be supporting 'cause in the past the meetings I went to only consisted of discussing the realistic plan to build a "queer/trans café" and only spoke about being transgender in the most superficial way possible. I wondered why so few showed up to the meeting when our whatsapp group is so big but now I understand that those who didn't, probably went there a few times and never wanted to go there again.

When I asked for experiences because I know some of them already had surgeries I received so many warnings and "think about it", specifically " wait a bit" and "it's not good enough yet". But a few messaged me privately and shared only positive experiences even the one with complications. But every single on of them who did, complained about this stigma that current methods are seen as bad and harmful and "not worth it" . Topped with the "fact" that "it's difficult to find a partner who is okay with a " fake set"" ... As if finding a partner isn't already difficult without being trans.

Also there is no guarantee that better methods are coming and getting available in the foreseeable future. How long should one exactly wait, forever?

Anonymous

Congrats anon.

“It’s not good enough yet.” When would it be to these people? Long after they’ve died? You’re willing to waste your life away instead of making something of it with the options that currently exist? “It’s difficult to find a partner who is okay with it” lmao, yeah no cause women just love a man without a penis, they’d definitely much rather have that then a “fake set” (and what a degrading way to talk about it).

I mean shit, for that matter, the options that we have for people with disabilities could also be said to not be good enough just yet, as we’re not at any point where we can “cure” them, but surely if they can return some physical abilities to a person then that’s quite worthwhile, isn’t it? Imagine losing your legs and denying yourself a wheelchair or even leg prosthetics because “it’s not good enough, I’ll wait until they can grow my legs back.”

But you know, these are (presumably) people who are speaking from baseless assumptions, not personal experience. I think you might be better off in a support group specific to men having bottom surgery or such. The personal accounts from people who actually had them are always much more positive. In a few months, your body will have a penis and it will look and feel and largely function like just a regular dick, and they’re going to just keep complaining and waiting for the rest of their life. I’d say you’re making the better choice here.

https://www.tumblr.com/kleefkruid/722538515347456000

Tumblr is now literally saying that being LGBT is a choice and that that is somehow better than it being innate? We are regressing at record speed. If being LGBT is a choice, then every LGBT person is causing their own oppression, are they not? Good job tumblr, you've invented yet another way to victim blame!

Anonymous

Tumblr was always full of transphobes, the “identity” crowd and “non-binary” crowd was always transphobic. The latter was built on it. Nothing new, really.

Tumblr was never some safe haven for transsexual people. It was a safe haven for teenage girls in their “I’m so different” phase LARP'ing as made-up “queer” identities revolving around their victim complexes, and now that they’re growing up, it’s a safe haven for radfems. Coincidentally.

Calling transsexual people “queer”, calling transsexual men “women” and transsexual women “men”, calling it a “choice” to “become” the opposite gender. And then dead seriously pushing this under the label “progressive.” Honestly, I don’t know why conservatives take issue with the non-binaries and the queerios; they should love them, with how they push for the exact same conservative values and deliberately spread and increase hatred against transsexual people.